As much as I want my girl to be very much like me in certain areas, I know deep inside my heart she is an individual who has her own thinking which there's nothing much I can change or do. She is soft spoken type and easy going by nature. I am not complaining that being nice is bad but sometimes being too nice can be taken advantage of by other people.
All along she gets along well with her peers and usually she will render her help to others. I always thought that she would not encounter much problems in the school so I tend to neglect her feeling at times.
One fine weekend night, while I was tucking her into bed. I decided to have a short conversation with her about her friends and school life. The moment she told me about this particular classmate of hers who was behaving rudely to her quite frequently, she broke down in tears. I had not seen her being so emotional before and was very worried for her.
Since young, she was taught to treat people with respect. Thus, she was expecting the same gesture back from others. She felt frustrated when she was unable to stop the problem by herself. It's not that she did not try but because she was not firm enough to stop that girl.
As a mother, I felt I needed to do something about it before the whole situation got out of control and worried that this particular bad experience would accumulate more and affected her emotional well-bring. I did what a mother should do and went to give a verbal warning to her classmate. In fact, that very night the girl's mother called me and apologised. I was glad the mother understood how my girl felt and we ended our conversation on a happy note. Hopefully this little setback in life would not affect YQ too much.
Dear YQ,
Mummy has something to tell you. Life is not a bed of roses, you are bound to encounter some difficulty at certain phases of your life. Learning to protect yourself is a process whereby you have to learn along the way. Do not be afraid to stand up for something which you feel is right and most importantly the intention is not to hurt anyone in the process but to get the message across.
I was left to defend and protect for myself since young. Ah ma never taught me how to do it but along the way I figured it out how to be one gradually. Maybe it's due to the environment I was grewing up in and maybe I had no siblings to turn to for help. Somehow, I managed to survive throughout my hostel life and schooling years and I hoped that you will also learn to figure it out slowly by yourself. Do not be afraid to speak out.
You are my little angel and I hope you will still be that nice little girl to everyone around you no matter what happen. Mummy is always there for you and do not be afraid to confide your problems to me in the future.
xoxo,
Mummy
I think at the end of the day it's important that we speak to our children and encourage them through the difficult times.
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